Fate

You either believe in fate.
or you don't.
Or you fall somewhere in the middle...

not knowing whether it's possible because if you do believe-- well, then is everything predestined? Or just the big things?  Or what???

Once upon a time or 16 years ago I met my former husband.

I don't like the word ex:

Sounds so death-like ...

So--I met my FORMER husband and without sounding wistful,

it was fateful.

I was 22, getting ready to graduate from college and living the urban fun life.

I wasn't into dating.

I was into dancing and drinking with my friends.

I had just gotten out of a horrible relationship a year before and spent a good year doing whatever my heart desired.

Then I met my former.

He asked me out.

I said no.

He asked me out for another night.

I said yes.

September 22, 1994.

Listening to music and drinking beer.

September 22, 1995.

A year of dating... I got him an anniversary gift...he said, "it's not like a real annivesary" and we laughed about it--and I didn't let him forget it.

September 22, 1996.

He proposed.  Our first baby girl was 4 months old.  He told me..."now it'll be a real anniversary" and we laughed...and cried.

Then life happened for many years and like how many couples..I hate to even think about myself being yet another statistic...we separated 1 1/2 years ago with 3 girls, amicable. 

This past week I received the court date for our dissolution.

September 22, 2010.

And I cried.

Cried because my dream of whatever family I had created had been altered, but also because of the

FATE of this date.

I felt/feel there was/is a reason.

It's poetic, as Tammie would say...and I see that sometimes it's ok to believe in fate--even if you don't what that actually means.